I am very fortunate to have been able to go to California and spend time with my aunt and uncle but in particular my grandma. I am not able to come and visit as often as I would like but when I do, I cherish the time that I have. Helen Horton, is my grandma, she is my father’s mom. She has always lived far enough away from me that it takes planning to be able to see her. It used to be a day drive to Mundelein, Illinois and now it is a plane ride into Orange County and a car ride to San Clemente. I saw my grandma in November, which was 9 months or so ago. A lot has happened since my last visit…
A few weeks ago, she fell and was unable to reach her lifeline to get help and ended up being on the floor all night. That was it, I thought that she was going to die. It takes a lot out of anyone if they have to spend a night on the floor, but especially for the older generation folks. But then she rallied. Helen is strong. There have been changes that had to be made as a result though, some she argued about, well actually many. Helen is opinionated. She moved from the independent living center named The Regency in Orange County to an independent but able to accommodate her when she needs it living center. The new place she is at is called San Clemente Villas by the Sea. The move went pretty smoothly except that she no longer had people to play Mahjong with. My aunt Mary found a woman on Facebook who was willing to come and teach her and other residents how to play. Now my grandma has the opportunity to play Mahjong again. There are other group things that my grandma participates ranging from Bingo to Black Jack. Helen is fun.
Helen is a shark. Oops, I should probably clarify that statement. My grandma is a shark when playing Canasta. There it is, that’s the most accurate way to describe her demeanor when playing cards. She taught me how to play when I was 8 years old. I had small hands back then…I still do. Anyway, I would have trouble holding all the cards in my hand. She would say, “Claire, it takes practice and stamina to endure this game.” Little did she know that those words would stick with me. They not only apply to playing Canasta or any other game for that matter but also for living life. I’m extremely grateful to those wise words that she told me almost 12 years ago. Helen is wise.
Many of you know that I struggle with balancing living with anxiety and depression. It takes practice letting go of worrying about things out of your control. Giving your concerns up to God or whoever or whatever. I like the image of letting them float away in a river. Stamina to keep at it. Trying new ways to handle stress. Medication and therapy balance. Letting people know your burdens and struggles.
This aging thing is rough. My grandma who went parasailing when she was 80 something now uses a walker all the time. She has hearing aids and still has trouble hearing. The hardest I think is that she is losing her eyesight due to macular degeneration. Macular degeneration is the deterioration of the macula, which is the central portion of the retina. The macula is responsible for focusing central vision in the eye controlling the ability to read, drive a car, recognize faces or colors, and seeing objects in fine detail. What does this mean for my grandma? It means that my Canasta queen card-shark grandma now struggles playing this game that we love. It’s harder for her to see what she has in her hand and to see what we’ve played. She still continues to play. We have been playing every single day that I’ve been in California. Helen is tenacious.
Helen is kind. Generous. Beautiful. Inspiring. Loving. Brave. Strong. Tenacious. Wise. I could list so many more qualities of my grandma but I think this is enough for you to see what kind of a woman my grandma is. I love her beyond the moon.
